God is Faithful

Back in May we had a consult with our Fertility Specialist to discuss implanting more embryos and to see what this "go-around" would look like. Crazy to say, but because of where I was in my cycle, we started the process that day!

This time around was going to be so much easier that the last, I had a patch to wear, 3 different medications and a cream. On June 21 ( a year after my due date with Annalise) we implanted 2 nice looking embryos. As you can see the one on the right was already beginning to hatch out meaning it was ready to implant in the wall of my uterus.

 



I felt like they were a lot more relaxed this time around, not sure why. Last time they implanted the embryos and then immediately they tilted the bed back and had me lay there for a full 30 minutes. This time as you can see they implanted them and then 2 minutes later had me get into a wheel chair and wheeled me to another room to hang out in a recliner for 30 minutes. I have to admit is was a lot more comfortable!

 



Once my time was up I was wheeled to the car and was told to lean my seat back all the way and to be horizontal for the next 24 hours. I was also told not to lift anything over 5 pounds for the next 2 weeks...haha yeah right I said. When you have a one year old I'm pretty sure that is impossible! Mario was definitely super daddy that whole weekend as I "vegged" on the couch.

On Day 10 I went in to test my Hcg levels but I "cheated" and tested at home as well and so I already knew the result. But as expected they called me the next days with my number 154..."Congratulations, you are pregnant".  Two days later I went in to make sure my numbers were doubling but because of the 4th of July, I wouldn't get the results until that Friday. Friday came and went and I never heard anything and when I called, the office had closed.

Well....you might be asking? I miscarried the baby just shy of 5 weeks. When the symptoms started I was honestly in shock, I didn't want to believe it but deep down I knew what was going on. Today I had a sonogram to confirm it...an empty uterus.

Have I grieved....yes. Am I upset....yes. Do I think about only having 3 to go back for....yes, all the time but I also know that God is faithful. God already knows how many kids we end up having in the end and because of that I can rest at night knowing that I worship a God who loves me and has a plan for my life far greater than I can see. We sang this song at church on Sunday that I wanted to share.

"Never Once"

Standing on this mountaintop
Looking just how far we’ve come
Knowing that for every step
You were with us

Kneeling on this battle ground
Seeing just how much You’ve done
Knowing every victory
Was Your power in us

Scars and struggles on the way
But with joy our hearts can say
Yes, our hearts can say

Never once did we ever walk alone
Never once did You leave us on our own
You are faithful, God, You are faithful

Kneeling on this battle ground
Seeing just how much You’ve done
Knowing every victory
Was Your power in us

Scars and struggles on the way
But with joy our hearts can say
Yes, our hearts can say

Never once did we ever walk alone
Never once did You leave us on our own
You are faithful, God, You are faithful
You are faithful, God, You are faithful

Scars and struggles on the way
But with joy our hearts can say
Never once did we ever walk alone
Carried by Your constant grace
Held within Your perfect peace
Never once, no, we never walk alone

Never once did we ever walk alone
Never once did You leave us on our own
You are faithful, God, You are faithful

Every step we are breathing in Your grace
Evermore we’ll be breathing out Your praise
You are faithful, God, You are faithful
You are faithful, God, You are faithful

You are faithful, God, You are faithful
You are faithful, God, You are faithful

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Looking back...

As I look back on this past year, I can't even believe how fast it's gone by. I stopped blogging after Annalise was born because...I've had a lot going on! I really wish I would have made time but unfortunately I didn't so I'm going to try to re-live each month of our sweet Annalise's first year (well almost).

1. Her first month was such a blur as most moms would probably agree to. We brought her home from the hospital weighing a whopping 5 lbs 13 oz, so they wanted her eating every 2-3 hours during the day and 3 at night. So as you can see, we were on survive mode! We had Mario's sister in town for a few days and then the in-laws for 2 weeks. My mom was up all the time too! We were very spoiled and her first month was here and gone in a blink of an eye. We noticed from the get go that she was a very "easy" baby. She was so chill, so lovable, and we could hold her forever. During this month we tried to establish a Feed, Wake, Sleep schedule and she even started sleeping in her own bed. She was immediately attached to the Wubbanub! Of course we were in Love with what our God blessed us with....a child....a girl....Annalise!

2. That August we transitioned back to school. Annalise stayed with a friend named Melissa who loved and cared for her while we were at work. She was great with keeping her on a schedule which was important to us. Weekends and evening were the best because we were with our girl. She loved her swing and was even starting to give us a few smirks. Colic Calm was very helpful this month as we worked through gas issues! Daddy was a pro at leg pumps...maybe a little too much. One time he decided to pump her legs without a diaper and I'll leave to rest to you :). Annalise started sleeping through the night...whew! 10-5 was sleep for us and was much needed being back at school working full time.

3. I remember month 3 being so much fun. She was now "talking" to us and her animal friends. After she was born she lost all her hair in the front. We joke all the time about our skullet baby, well it finally started slowly growing back this month. Every Sunday she went to Sunday School and of course they loved having such a little one in there. I loved that we didn't have to worry about winter colds, the flu, etc as much since we had her in the summer, so as soon as she got her 2 mo shots, I was completely comfortable putting her in Sunday School.

4. My mom bought Annalise her first Halloween costume...a Giraffe. What else of course? She was attached to her giraffe wubbanub so it was only fitting that she be a giraffe! I know it's sad because time goes by so quickly so I don't remember a whole lot about 4 months except that she just kept getting so much fun! By 4 months she was sleeping I think 10 hours a night which didn't leave much of an afternoon with her but Sleep at this age is so important, so we cherished our weekends together! She loved going to see Melissa each morning. We had an awesome opportunity to stand before our congregation at church and pray that we as parents were going to commit to raising her in a home that knew Jesus and would teach her God's faithful word...so humbled that God would entrust us to raise his precious daughter to know Him!

5. The day she turned 5 mo was the first time she got "sick". Annalise and I stayed the night with granny and it was the first night since she had turned 5 weeks that she woke up in the middle of the night...yes she's a sleeper. I remember that night like it was yesterday...sad. Having a sick child is the worst. She couldn't breathe through her nose and had a horrible cough. I thought she had RSV but thankfully just a stinking Cold/Allergies. Yes, she has allergies already,..bummer. Annalise was still super chill at this age. You had to really work to get her to smile because she was so content just hanging out with Whoever wanted to hold her. I loved this about her.

6. I loved 6 months! Her little personality was really starting to form! This month was so exciting. We got to spend time at my parents for Christmas, my mom came up to see Annalise before we headed out and then she got to experience her first plane ride to Miami. If she would have stayed in Texas she would have had her first ever white Christmas, but that's okay, we had a blast with Mario's family in Florida! We stopped swaddling her this month because she was finally trying to get out so she could find her wubbanub so mommy and daddy wouldn't have to go in in the middle of the night and put it in for her. Some might say we swaddled to long but honestly she LOVED it, she could be going crazy and as soon as we got her in that thing...immediate difference; calm and ready for the lights to be out! She is talking all the time now and even got her two bottom teeth. I swear by the amber teething necklace...no symptoms. This month we introduced food to her diet :) so much fun seeing what she liked and didn't like at this age.

7-10. I bunch these months up together because I honestly can't remember month by month...I know...sad! She switched daycares when we got back from Miami. Melissa was awesome but I wanted her to be around more kids and the teacher of her new class was in absolute love with Annalise. Everyday I would go to pick her up and I would ask how it went..."perfect" was a very consistent answer. She said that Annalise was the easiest baby (don't worry...read ahead to month 11 :) ). Annalise loves being with all the other kids and they love her!! Everyday....baby Annalise is here! She is the youngest so she is the "baby". She ate like a champion during these months liking pretty much everything but yogurt. We got to get all dolled up for her first Easter. Oh wait, backup, she had her first Valentine Party at school...yes I saved her valentine cards. Maybe a scrapbook in the near future! Annalise unfortunately went from having two dogs to one dog during this time, but it was what was best for our family without sharing all the details...I do miss Abbie though ;(. Annalise has really taken notice of Wade during these last few months. Are we mobile yet? nope but definitely showing interest and starting to scoot with her booty by 10th month.

11. Month 11 has been a game changer for the Arroyave Family!!! Wow, Annalise has gone from being so chill and content to moving EVERYWHERE. She crawls like an "injured soldier" as I call it...one leg dragging in the back. So funny to watch! She no longer wants to give us mouth wide open kisses all the time but more of her hand in our face. But, despite the times that I think "oh dear", the next second I'll be lying on the floor and she'll come over to me and lay her head on mine and kiss and love on me. We have a Sweet Sweet girl with a dash of Sass as I say!


12. One year old and she is pulling up on everything and standing for short periods of time before she plumps down on her bottom. We are no longer using a bottle! She is eating food and drinking her whole milk. We will either give her pancakes, waffles, or eggs with either fruit or yogurt. She will also drink her milk during this time. For lunch and dinner she'll eat whatever we eat with her milk and for snacks she'll have a little something with water. She transitioned like a pro...didn't seem to phase her at all! She actually eats like a boy. There is nothing this girl doesn't  like, except spicy salsa that dad tried to give her :(. We are loving our summer with this One year Old! We took a visit to the zoo, I'll blog about that adventure another time, we swim which she loves, and we play play play!

Annalise has been such a blessing to us. I tear up thinking about how God entrusted Mario and I with this sweet girl and I couldn't be more happy. I can't wait to teach her about our Creature, our Father, our Savior! Right now when I pray with her and read to her out of the Children's bible she's not very interested but I know how important it is to keep doing it and instilling in her God's word! Our pastor was preaching a couple of weeks ago about fathers pastoring the home and he asked this question (in my own words). If your child didn't have Sunday School or church but only you to teach him/her the word of God and being a light for Jesus, would they know it? We have such huge jobs as Parents and I'm so thankful for our God of Grace! My prayer is that Annalise will know Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior one day, how sweet would that be!

Goal: keep blogging. Hope everyone is enjoying their summer!

Delivery Day

June 10th-Sunday-the day before!

Sunday morning Mario and I woke up and went to church to hear such a great message on stewardship. It really spoke to me knowing that we were about to have this little baby and how God  is the creator and owner over this sweet girl and we are to be great stewards.The question that I left with was ? Do I ultimately see everything I have as Gods? One day all stewards will answer....What have I or am I doing with the things God has loaned to me? Such great questions to really think about, especially when you ask that question about another human being. I'm so thankful that God has chosen and has entrusted us with this girl.

After church we stopped and got subway and headed home to just relax, get some last minute things together (aka my suitcase), and to enjoy the last few hours with just the two of us.  We ended up watching Spy Game and hanging out with Abbie and Wade. At 7 pm I took the dogs to Midlothian for a little stay and picked up our friends ipad (they generously let us use it while at the hospital so we could facetime with Mario's parents), and then headed back to pick up daddy! We loaded the car and made our way to Mansfield Medical Center! It was such an exciting drive knowing that the next time we would be in the car, it would be three of us! We swung by Whataburger to pick up some dinner for Mario. I wasn't hungry at the time but I regretted that decision later ;). At 8:00 we arrived at the hospital and checked in. I couldn't believe that it was really happening. They walked us to our room (room 8) and advised me to put on this super cool gown and told me the nurse would be in shortly to ask us some questions and to get the process started!!!! EEEK!

Melissa walked into the room and introduced herself as my night shift nurse and started asking the billion and one questions. While she was doing this another nurse named Kathy came in and started my IV. I hate the amount of tape they put on your arm bc you know that when you go to take it off it's going to HURT!! After the IV and questions, they inserted this little pill inside me. She told me that I had to lay flat for 30 minutes and then I could eat after an hour. I was already starving so Mario saved me one of his chicken fingers. Remind you I had not eaten anything since lunch. She told me to eat as much as I wanted to because after midnight I couldn't have anyting. She also told me to get some sleep because every four hours she would be coming in to insert this pill. I was thinking this whole time that they would do this throughout the night and then start the pitocin first thing in the morning but she said the pitocin wouldn 't start until 1 pm the next day. WHAT? I thought I would have a baby by then but now they're saying the inducing meds wern't coming until later! So I called my family to let them know that they probably wouldn't want to come super early in the morning bc it was going to be a long day! After she left we turned on the TV and Mario ventured out to find a vending machine. When he returned it was about the time that I could eat. I ate the chicken and something else from the vending machine and then laid down to sleep. A couple of hours later I was still up! I called Melissa and asked her for some sleeping meds :) which did the trick quickly! The only thing I really remember after that point was her coming back at 4 am to insert a pill and then at 7:00 am my new nurse introducing herself (Margie). Dr. Morehead also came in sometime and debriefed us and told us that he thought Annalise would be here sometime that night. They brought in some breakfast and when I say breakfast, this is what I'm talking about!

Yes a Popsicle, chicken broth (which I didn't touch), and some jello. Mario went down and got some cafeteria food!

At 7:45 my water broke. Yes this happened on its own! I stood up to use the bathroom and realized I had a trail. What? I didn't even know my water had broken! I thought for sure I would feel it but I did not. I told Mario to call the nurse that my water had broken. She confirmed this! So this meant that we could start the pitocin meds early!!! They came and changed the IV bag and very shortly after the contractions started coming. They felt like really strong cramps but nothing I couldn't handle. I told Mario that I wanted to watch last weeks episode of the Bachelorette to take my mind off the pain.

 Half way through the show the contractions were a lot stronger. So strong that I couldn't concentrate on my show! I turned it off and decided to rest....impossible! I remember a pain management nurse coming in and asked if there was anything she could do. I told her that I really wanted an epidural but that I was only dilated to a one and that I wanted to hold off bc I did not want a c-section and since my water broke I was crunched with time. She asked if I wanted to get up and sit on the birthing ball which I did. This helped for a little bit. While on the birthing ball my granny and papa came in! This helped take my mind off the pain for a little bit. Mario was also a HUGE help. He would push on my lower back during the contractions which helped a lot!

Also during this time, my mom,  momma donna and best friend Tiffany showed up! I got to visit them during the breaks but by this time my contractions were  1.5 minutes apart so our conversations were broken up! I remember talking and then bam they would start up again and I would say "not again"! I probably said this 50 times because every time I would have to lay my head down on the bed and I would concentrate my way through each contraction. Finally my nurse came in and asked how things were going. She obviously knew I was in pain and said that if I wanted to have the epidural she thought it would be okay. So I said SIGN ME UP!

The anesthesiologist came in and we signed the papers and talked through the process. Everyone always says the epidural is pain free but I felt the numbing meds they inserted first. Honestly the whole thing was strange! I told him that I didn't want much meds, I still wanted to be able to move my legs. He did a great job. I could no longer feel the contractions but I could still move my legs (like jello). After this everyone came back in the room. This time my mom, dad, stepmom, and sister had arrived. They said hello and then went back in the waiting room so I could rest. I remember at one point I started feeling the contractions coming back pretty strong so I asked Mario to give my button a push to release more meds. It was NOT working. I called the anesthesiologist and said that we had pushed the button but it wasn't working. He told me that I had to wait a good 15-30 minutes. After 30 minutes they were getting worse!!! He came back in and I said it's not working so he told me to push the button one more time and to push it every 10 minutes so I did. When I pushed it I heard this beep that I didn't hear when Mario pushed it. As you can imagine I was NOT happy, he didn't push it hard enough so that whole time I wasn't getting anything! So now I had to wait another 15 minutes for it to kick in. During this time Tiffany decided to show me pics of her trip to Europe. Look at my face :)

haha!
At 5:00 Dr. Morehead came to check on me and told me that I was still only a ONE....I was thinking to myself there is no way I'm a one when I hurt so bad and could feel the contractions with the epidural. He said he'd be back in an hour to check me again and to see if anything had happened. At 6:15 the doctor came back in and I went from a 1 to a 9. He told me that there was this ligament that was in the way keeping them from really being able to check me...so who knows what I had really been dilated at all day ;) He told the nurse to prep the room. It all happened so fast I was in disbelief! The NICU unit came down and the surgical tech came in to assist the dr. if needed so needless to say, we had a FULL room!

The nurse had me do a few practice pushes and when the doc was ready I started pushing. I think it took 5 contractions that I had to push through and she was out! Born at 7:02 pm. Weighing 5 lbs 13 oz, 20 inches long. Here are her first few pictures!

Annalise we love you!

38 Weeks

Well the house is clean and the nursery is finished and we are ready for Annalise to be here! Sunday night I will go in and Monday they will induce me. This last week I really wanted to lay out in the sun to work on my tan before her arrival but all I can seem to do is Clean...the rooms inside out, the baseboards, everyting!

I finally feel huge, this whole time everyone has told me how small I look but I think she finally poked out bc my stomach is out there for sure! As you can see below the broom and dustpan are out. Ohh we also got new carptet in what I would call our "pee room". When we first got Abbie she would go upstairs and pee. Even though we would clean it, it soaked down the the carpet pad and started smelling so finally the smell is gone!

How far along? 38 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: 25 pounds 

Maternity clothes? Yes

Stretch marks? No...yah I made it without stretch marks!!!!! 

Sleep: Prettty uncomfortable...can't wait to sleep on my stomach!
 

Best moment this week:  Finding out that Annalise will be here JUNE 11...MONDAY!

Have you told family and friends: Yes

Miss Anything? being able to just bend over, sleeping on stomach, regular clothes, working out

Movement: ALL the time! She is Ready!

Symptoms: HUNGRY!!

Food cravings: No

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nope

Have you started to show yet: Yes

Gender prediction: ANNALISE

Labor Signs: No, not dialated but 50% effaced

Belly Button in or out? OUT

Wedding rings on or off? On...no swelling :)

Happy or Moody most of the time: HAPPY

Looking forward to: meeting this little rascal on Monday!

What has daddy learned?

I'm sitting at the dining room table just a-typing away with the baby monitor not far from my reach. It's different for sure, but man is it worth it! Mommy is out having lunch with a friend, so I get the nod to take care of Annalise. I figured while I was doing so that I'd update our blog and give just a few things I've learned in the 4 weeks of being a dad. Now please note, just because I know or have learned some things doesn't mean I in any way know what I'm doing! 1. Night feeding isn't that bad: I've actually gotten quite accustomed to having to get up in the middle of the night and feed the little lady. I have really enjoyed being able to do this because although nothing is said (I'm not really awake at these feedings either), I feel like Annalise and I have bonded some during these times. I will say however that the 1:30-2 AM feeding is pretty darn tough! Once I get past that one I know the sun will be up soon enough and then I function pretty well. 2. No time is out of the question to go to the store to get something: I was the happiest guy in Ellis county the other night at 11:30 because I knew the gas drops I was about to go buy we're going to get Annalise to stop crying and allow mom and I to get some sleep. 3. When tired you'll do some crazy stuff: I have now successfully turned off the baby monitor during a nap and in he middle of the night without my knowledge. Christen and I were convinced the product was defective because surely I wasn't skilled enough to keep doing it and not remember! 4. It just keeps on getting better: I was more than content on day 1 with Annalise, but it seems that every passing day brings me more joy. I think for first time parents it has a lot to do with being more comfortable with what your life is now like as opposed to what it used to be. 5. My admiration for my wife has gone to heaven and back: I thought I knew how special moms were. I mean my mom is one extra special person in my life, but watching Christen with our daughter takes it to a whole new level. I am not ashamed to say that I am more in love with Christen now than ever before. Seeing how she is with Annalise makes her more attractive in my eyes. OK I'll stop there. 6. Annalise is a huge responsibility: In church a few weeks ago we focused on stewardship and what that means. I believe that all that we have has been given to us by God, but taking it further that it still belongs to God. You see everyone can agree that when we die we will take nothing with us. This includes Annalise. While she is under my care I am to point her to Jesus because as one of God's children that is what He would want me to do with her. Therefore, treating her as a "rental" I should treat her better than I treat myself. 7. I know NOTHING: This I have found is the best approach to parenting. When in moments of crisis and I am trying to figure out the most complicated answer to the most complicated problem that is Annalise, the best thing to do is play dumb! The one thing that I've found that I do need to know how to do...get on my knees. Hope y'all have enjoyed reading and were sorry about the delay in postings. I think you'll understand that the Arroyave household is a bit of a mad house rig now.

What?? Annalise will be here next week!!

This is correct...I will be going in either next Sunday or Monday night depending on when hospital has openings. I'll find out for sure today. Last week when I went in she was measuring at 33 weeks when she should have been closer to 37 do he wanted a sonogram this week to make sure my amniotic fluid was okay and to take her measurements. So yesterday Dr. Morehead did the sono on me and sure enough Little miss Annslise was measuring in the 5th percentile. My amniotic fluid was great and not low and her heart is still super strong so she is so small either bc one) she is just a small little baby or two) my placenta may not be giving her everything she needs but either way she is good right now but they want to take her earlier than later just to be safe! We got to see a little glimpse of her sweet squished face...sure enough that left hand was right up next to her face like its been at every sonogram! (makes me wonder if she will be a leftie like her dad??) and by her face I think she is going to look a lot like Mario's sister Bea! Both Mario and I was like "oh my goodness, she looks just like Bea" which she is a female version of Mario. We will see very shortly! Wish I could post pics but once again no computer:) Please be praying for Annalise this last week of her growing inside of me and also for Mario as he has a tough decision coming up if he gets the job at global here in waxahachie. This means he'll have to mAke a decision bt two jobs so pray for that!

37 weeks

We are officially under 3 weeks to go until her ETA:-). Yes, I'm starting to finally realize that we're about to have a baby! I mean of course I've been pregnant knowing this whole time we are obviously going to be parents, but something about this last week has made it seem more "real"! Mario are I are both out of school and it feels awesome! Let's just say I didn't understand the whole "nesting" that women go through until this last week...I feel like a crazy woman cleaning every closet, dusting all the baseboards, and the list goes on... Mario had two job interviews this past week! As most may know he has been teaching in Maypearl for the last 6 years and is now looking for a change and somewhere a little closer due to our car situation at the time. One job offered him a job on the spot but he's waiting for another school to get back with him. We should know something this week so we will keep you posted! Both districts are within 5 minutes from our casa. I am now seeing the doctor every week which being out of school makes this really easy. Last week when they measured me, Annalise was measuring really small so Monday they want to do a sonogram to see what percent she is in. If she is under the tenth percentile with weight, Morehead will more than likely want to induce me this week. I don't want to type out all the details as to why bc I'm typing from my phone but let's just say I really feel like she is just a little girl who was folded up awkwardly causing the measurements to be off. Mario and I are actually on our way to a birthing class...yes I know I procrastinated a little bit! I missed signing up for one at our hospital so were driving over an hour to attend one in Granbury TX. Do I even have a hospital bag packed or a car seat installed??? Well if you know me at all then you know that my answer is no! This will be on the agenda tomorrow! Stats: I've gained 23 pounds, still no cravings, very uncomfortable when it comes to sleeping, getting very excited to hold this crazy girl ( yes I say crazy bc she never stops! She is constantly moving from side to side). And so curious to see who she is going to look like! After viewing baby pics this week of Mario and I, let's hope she looks like Mario:), Annalise now gets the hiccups all the time...it started around 34 weeks just in the middle of the night but the last few weeks it's any time of the day.

From last week:

How far along? 36 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: 23 pounds 

Maternity clothes? Pants
Stretch marks? No
Sleep: Prettty uncomfortable

Best moment this week:  Finishing SCHOOL!

Have you told family and friends: Yes

Miss Anything? being able to just bend over

Movement: ALL the time!

Symptoms: HUNGRY!!

Food cravings: No
Anything making you queasy or sick: Nope

Have you started to show yet: Yes

Gender prediction: ANNALISE

Labor Signs: No
Belly Button in or out? 1/2 of the way out
Wedding rings on or off? On
Happy or Moody most of the time: Both

Looking forward to: Monday's Doctor's appointment to see if I've progressed at all!